I want to live in one big empty space. Now when I say empty, I really do mean EMPTY. I tried living in an empty space once in Baltimore when I had an apartment, but that only lasted a few days. I brought a suitcase with me with all my clothes in there and put it in the bathtub so it didn’t take up any space in my room. The only thing I had in my room was a blanket and a pillow. But I didn’t even want to have the blanket and the pillow in my room seeing that it is hypocritical, since a real empty space shouldn’t have anything in it at all.

I would like to cut up and divide my house and spread it out so that different sections of the house would be totally separated from each other. For instance, my bathroom would be a totally separate piece of space from my bedroom, kitchen, and closet. This way, I would never have to clean my room, and I won’t have to sleep or eat near my dump, dirty laundry, left over foods and other bodily and material wastes.

My ideal house :

It would have the bedroom in the Africa safari because the weather there is so warm that I wouldn’t need to cover myself up with a blanket when I sleep. I could then fulfill my fantasy of sleeping in a completely empty space. This bedroom space would be a cone-shaped architecture so there won’t be any ceiling or corners. Without them, you get an even emptier structure because you’d have less material surfaces to think and worry about or paint over, and clean. This coned structure will be situated right in the middle of the safari where I would sleep naked in every night. It would just be me, naked and alone in this cone-shaped, white space devoid of distractions and material objects – a rather abstract, surreal, and existential image. By living in an empty space, you can eliminate a lot of problems and worries. I have OCD, so I tend to worry about things before i go to sleep, like whether or not the lights are off in the kitchen, if the garage door is closed, is the bathroom flushed, or if the stove is turned off. The first step to maintain living in an empty space is to make sure that your closet is located in a completely separate space. If teleportation becomes a reality, then my closet would have to be, at the very least, in another continent. I would like my closet to be in Taiwan, not just because I like the their clothes, but also because my father had hired a super talented maid who has the skill to fold my underwear into perfect squares. Another problem I have is sleeping too close to my bodily and material wastes. After I wake up each morning, I would go to France to piss because I like how the typical French toilets are engineered; the hole is at the back, so the excrement is supposed to disappear as quickly as possible so that you won’t have to be confronted with your own shit (unlike the Chinese toilets where the excrement sit in a flat surface where you DO have to confront your own shit). I would like my kitchen and my dining room to be in Japan because I love sushi and Japanese food helps me stay skinny. Finally, to do the earth’s environment a favor, I want my little trash can to be floating in deep space and be connected to the a black hole.

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