I WANT TO GET RID OF MY ENTIRE BODY TO KEEP ONLY THE MIND. Then i could use my pure mind to carve out a new body that is entirely conceptual, thus more powerful than a material one. I often feel as if I have no body anyway, except when Im having sex or lifting,for these dialectic endeavors, one out of pleasure (eros), and the other out of pain(thanatos) are the only ways for me to hold on to the materiality of my body…to keep it from dissolving within the logical confinement of spacetime.
My Adam’s apple accidentally rolled out of my throat when I was practicing headstand. It bounced violently around my room, and everytime I tried to catch it, it splited into two. Now my whole room is filled with multiplicity of bouncing Adam’s apples.
just bit off a piece of his dad’s scalp and is chewing it as bubble gum. Now my breath smells awesome.
My foods don’t occupy in the 4 dimensional space-time because they are curled up in extra dimensions that are hidden. These foods negate…as their presence create little holes that break up the smooth continuum of both the internal/subjective and the external/objective realms of reality. It’s very hard to extract these foods from where they are situated; the only way to do so is to suck them out of their habitats with my spinning anus.
Now when you eat and swallow negative food, it will create tiny little black holes inside your stomach, and you will feel HUNGRIER and LIGHTER, as consumption means being consumed at the same time. Since negative food is the reverse of regular food, it will be consumed when you are full, and not when you are hungry. It will be useful when you ate the wrong kind of regular food or for cleaning out your stomach, or if you want more room in it to taste more regular food or simply to keep up with your fat date.
Other than the feeling of hunger, there are also other psychological and phenomenological effects…as your sense of being will become emptier, fainter, and more condensed. But keep in mind, using my food to lose weight probably isn’t very efficient because my food isn’t designed for this purpose (you would still need to hit the gym, for there is no shortcut for losing weight!). You will feel lighter in spirit, but not necessarily thinner in a physical sense, although the psychological negation resulted upon ingestion might still cause the body to diminish. Which means that you will most likely lose yourself in an ontological and phenomenological manner, as your memories and perceptions will fade and dilute. Overall your ego and its deepest essence will slowly divert, and then dissolve and disperse, where the contradiction between opposites extends to full degrees, so that the duality of mind and matter may finally repudiate each other to form pockets of voids for you to evaporate within in order to BECOME nothingness…
We are always creating and projecting a void of trajectory into the unknown future and the imaginary, in which we attempt to fill with the materiality of actualities and actions. But once that void is filled, we once again become dissatisfied and discontent, and new trajectories must be once again projected ahead of our flesh and bodies in order for desire to keep itself afresh and content. The hopes and projections of anticipation make up who we are, and our bodies and minds are merely the manifestation of future desires. This is how we progress individually and collectively, by always seeking out and acquiring into the future in order to fulfill our personal prophecies to satisfy desires, hopes, and dreams. I think the future trajectories of our beings can be conceived as a bundle of needs, wishes, and impulses which are in various states of integration and conflict. Simply put, we are programmed to be consuming animals, constantly trying to acquire different and new needs and wants, and it is through the process of completing and satisfying our needs and wants that we move towards a state of being beyond our current levels of affairs. Different people organize these desires differently, in which various modes of intensities, qualities, and gratifications both give rise to and evolve under changing historical and political conditions and can never be isolated from other individuals. These ‘lines of future desires’ intersect, evolve, and intertwine, and embody with other trajectories in the world so that our collective unconscious and consciousness can progress and evolve both dialectically and organically.
Death then becomes the continuation of life, synthesized through an organic fashion of materiality until an immaterial continuity is formulated. This process of disembodiment from the embodied is a way our consciousness cheats itself. When we try to imagine the unimaginable, certain images are conjured up to satisfy and fulfill the meaning-making system of our brains. People began to imagine ghostly, semi-transparent holograms that have an immaterial and inorganic placement in an otherwise mechanical, organic, and material environment. A mild inconsistency and discontent is thus created through the rationalization of the irrational, as we force ourselves to believe the unbelievable. This discomforting inconsistency could be highlighted and emphasized by the following question: When you are a kid watching Casper the friendly ghost, does it ever bother you that Casper can both fly through a wall and catch a ball?
What you do when you take a photograph of somebody is that you look through a dark hole (the lens) in order to highlight the best and the most coveted part of that person to capture the most desirable moment of her current mode of existence. The more intimate we wish to become with that person (when we want to capture a close up, for example) the closer we need to zoom in on her, and the longer the camera lens needs to be extended. The extension of the lens could be seen as a metaphor for the penis that is becoming longer and more erect. When our model finally discloses the vigorous emotional output and when the moment of ecstasy is revealed, you press the button on the camera to capture this fleety, and climatic moment. This is when a metaphorical orgasm occurs. The rhythmic flashing of the camera symbolizes the patterns of ejaculation, as photon particles from the flashlight ‘shoot’ out spasmodically like sperms to end up on the face and body of our model.
This notion of objectifying the figure can be extended to cinematic pleasure in Hollywood films in which gender is an issue. In practice, women are often “objectified” on screen, as they are displayed for the visual pleasure of male viewers both within the film itself and in the audience that watches the film. With the aid of film cameras and the way they can capture and objectify an individual from multiple perspectives of desires, mainstream Hollywood cinema fetishes the female form as embodied in the ‘perfect’ figure of Hollywood actresses. The audience (mostly middle classed males) shares identification with the male actors on screen (often the protagonist) to adopt male desire in looking and gazing at the female on screen. This act of erotic speculation and gazing can extend itself beyond the horizon of merely “looking” and “imagining”, as it is often the case that male spectators would actually masturbate to the characters or events in a film…an act that expends the perceptual limitation of cinema and art as they mentally, and to a certain degree, physically “interact” with the objects inside the screen.
In fact, watching a film can be viewed as an act of voyeuristic pleasure in and of itself. Movie-goers can all be conceived as Peeping Toms who derive pleasure from watching others without the acknowledgements from objects that they desiring and observing. In other words, the audience’s vicarious enjoyment of watching a film in a darkened room is voyeuristic because pleasure is derived from the viewer’s awareness of seeing without being seeing. The characters in the film have no power over their representations, as they become, again, objects of desires for the spectators that are sitting in the dark, watching events unfold with an eye that is unlike the camera lens itself.
The world doesn’t always make sense, and it’s hard for people to accept this notion. The idea that things sometimes happen for no reason, and that events sometimes have no meaning is disruptive and threatening to society and to our consciousness.
The world is full of “pre-personal singularities”. Meaning that language cannot fully organize reality’s free-roaming fluxes and chaos. We attempt to use concepts, symbols and languages and thoughts to label, systematize, and even tame reality, but we ultimately fail at this doing this because reality in itself has no order or fixed being – concept and language create this order, while at the same time, failing to capture the very orderliness that it creates. Science tries to quantify and “cut up” reality, categorizes and spatializes it into discrete parts in order to form a whole. But modern physics shows us that the Whole, or reality itself, is made up of fragmentations of irrationality, chaos, randomness and principles that are based on uncertainty. To predict and measure one thing is to distort the outcome of its very own measurements and predictions.
I think that dreams and the unconscious – the irrational, the random, and the absurd are unvalued. The futile attempts by human beings to impose rationality and order on an otherwise irrational and chaotic universe could be a violent gesture. Perhaps people need to stop being so concerned with manufacturing the rational by putting everything into perspectives and just embrace, from time to time, the organic chaos of the world. I think to perceive the world as a whole and to deepen the foundation of the reality and be ever more passionate about the world, we should embrace both aspects of reality; the rational and the irrational, dream and reality, the conscious and the unconscious, the real and the symbolic as if they are one and the same thing, and not privilege one over the other.
What I try to do in my videos and sculptures is to express and invoke the irrational and the surreal. I have problem with people not “getting” my work because I think to a certain extend, as llong as you figure out the meaning behind a piece of artwork or a film, it ceases to become interesting. People tend to look at a certain pieces of artwork, read a poem, or watch a film and walk away with a befuddled expression and call the work weird and senseless. Yes, it is baffling to the mind to not be able to fully comprehend the meaning of behind a piece of work, but sometimes that is exactly what the artist or the writer’s intention was – to emphasize the randomness and the chaotic nature of reality and to show the observer that not everything is, or needs to be rational, and that sometimes not making sense is where it makes the most sense.
I want to detach my own head and hold it in my hands to give himself a blowjob.
The fundamental transition between the biological and the psychological aspects of love and hate, life and death are precisely instances of such qualitative macro-changes. I don’t think it’s possible, in most cases anyway, to really love somebody without a certain embodiment and manifestation of hate, and vice versa. This is because to experience a complete dissonance, a certain degree of harmony must be pre-established. You cannot break something if it wasn’t a whole to begin with, and to connect parts together you must already be forming a whole. In other words, you have to first put your feet in your opponent’s shoes and become who they are and understand his side of the argument before you have the means to disagree with them and to to not be who they are. So there is a sort of a metaphysical dance between creation and annihilation, being and non-being, life and death, love and hate… where both sides of the dialectical configuration emerge and dissolve into each other to form new growths and becomings. And this play of differences and similarities goes on endlessly in our own thoughts, between people, and in the broader instances within culture and society. So you really aren’t that different from your opponents, as polar opposites are really two pieces of dialectical fragments that make up, and give birth to a synthetic whole that is both self-creating and self-negating.
Hate and love are two emotions that create extremely close bonds between individuals. When people are going through a love and hate relationship, their thoughts and bodies have to be in very close contact. The thought and body language feed off of each other, as the two manifests and embeds upon one another in an on-going feedback loop. The body is the extension of thought, and the thought is the extension of the body. When people are in really close contact, talking about something very passionately, whether they are agreeing or disagreeing, their whole bodies are involved – their neurons are firing together, their hearts, their neurochemicals, their adrenalin, their breaths, everything. But in order for this connection to occur, people can suddenly become totally unfamiliar with certain parts of their body. The contact between different individuals during these moments can be far closer than with some parts of their own bodies – say your toes, your pinkies, or even your very own thought.
What I’m trying to say is, to establish the phenomenon of “one mind-body” connection, whether as a result of love or hate, and whether it is between two individuals or a group of people, their bodies and thought must become partially out-growing or incomplete in order to be receptive upon reproduction and production. Aren’t there moments where we become totally unaware of certain parts of our bodies because we are so engaged in the embodiment and the connectivity between ourselves and others in the world? And aren’t there also moments where parts of our bodies are so full with energy that it overflows with desire and vitality of flesh, soul, and blood? This results in very odd spectacles, as if we experience a rupture in the fabric of reality, as if a black hole has been created in space-time so that it could be simultaneously filled up and contained. A negative movement which yields the production of a positive one, a sort of a break to form a hollow gesture so a that full one can refill its space to form a fusion which is superior to and subsumes both the initial proposition and its counterpart.