– I want to be a janitor at a gym and wipe the floor in the corner while watching ignorant trainers and gym goers go on with their weak routines. I will secretly be the strongest and the rippest guy in the whole place and do my squat workout after everyone had gone home for the day and leave the plates and chalk on the bar to baffle everyone in the morning. I will be the gym version of Will in Good Will Hunting

– I have a strange new sleep disorder. It’s a twisted form of insomnia that can only cured by speed. Not too long ago, I discovered this strange phenomenon while I was out jogging. I fell asleep in the middle of a run, had a pleasant dream, and woke up as soon as my body stopped moving. And then I realized that I could fall asleep easier if I ran faster. When it got to a point when I would sprint at top speed and still couldn’t fall asleep, I started taking my bicycle out whenever I needed to doze off. As the disorder progressed, more and more speed was demanded by my body, so I began to sleep on the back of my dad’s motorcycle. A few weeks into my diagnosis, I had to hail down a cab every night just so I could fall asleep on the freeway. Next was the local train…And finally, unless I book a flight from Taiwan to America every night, I would find myself in a permanent state of insomnia…

– I have an urge to slice and rip open the skin around my eyes because I am frustrated about how small/insignificant those peep-holes are relative to the size of the universe.It’s unjustifiable that a world this big has to enter through those shitty opening. The world is a giant genitalia, but my eyes are just not big enough for it to penetrate…so it hurts…and the freedom of my soul is out of reach.

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Sadness is sexy. I like damaged girls the way I like eating leftovers. I’m attracted to girls who are in pieces. It boosts my ego to glue them back like a piece of puzzle. Think about it, but nobody ever buys puzzles that have all the pieces already in place. It gives me a hard on when a girl confesses to me how sad she is, and how she still fantasizes about her ex when we have sex. There’s no point in having a relationship with someone who is cheerful all the time because you would have nothing to do.

It’s a well-kept secret : Being sad and emo can get you laid. Couples like to share their sadness together, it’s what glues relationships and trust together: the confession of suffering. People like hearing how lonely and miserable the other person is. It makes them feel better about themselves and it gives them a chance to be the hero and fix her up for the ultimate ego-booster. Another thing I find that’s almost always true is how girls who just got dumped by their boyfriends and are in a bad breakups always give it up more easily. It’s the desperation that makes them easy…but sometimes it is also the urge for revenge. You can say that when the heart breaks and leaks, so does the vagina.

It is my fantasy to walk across the globe on my foot, visiting cancer patients in every hospital and screwing them all on their death beds while their family members, doctors, nurses, and all the people who can do nothing to save them watch on…I want to cum on their sadness and make them whole. Sometimes I masturbate to pictures of girls who are undergoing chemo and have no hair or are covered in bandages or tumors. I find the sadness and miseries in those images very sexy.

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-If I was a marriage counselor, my advice for couples who are struggling in their love/sex lives would be for both parties to “switch things up” by undergoing sex change operations. It’s the ultimate way to show empathy. (Direct body part exchanges would be ideal). That, and to hire a 350 pound black bodybuilder as a housemaid. All that muscle and strength would be very useful for cleaning dirty underwear.

– There’s nothing more pleasurable than sticking the fingers into a human body.I want to chop off both of my pinkies to let the right one rape the left until they give birth to infinite numbers of pinkies like the way rats multiply. I will infect the whole planet with my pinkies.They will squirm and crawl into vaginas and poke at all the holes in the human body until everyone on the planet becomes smooth and hole-less.

– Lucid dream update: My pinky started to squirm and shake violently like a vibrator, so I chopped it off to use it on my girlfriend. But when I took off her panties she already had a penis, so I stitched the pinky onto it (like hair extension) and made it extra long and deadly. Then she raped me…Fortunately, my nervous system was still attached to my pinky, so in a way, I got to control the way I was violated

– Nothing excites my imagination more so than boredom and loneliness. The more idle the body, the more alive the mind…(when I am dreaming, my body is paralyzed, yet the mind is completely active). The more alone I am, the more accompanied (by thoughts) I feel. This is why I should make a content and efficient prisoner.

– Lucid dream update : I was so embarrassed in front of my date that the only solution I had of disappearing was sticking my own head inside my anus. Then my whole body was consumed by it until I became nothing but a floating anus (dot). Then I flew around the world and got super hungry. Finally I stopped by a buffet full of nothing but live snakes and sucked them all up.

– I think one of the best ways to motivate and psych yourself up during a workout if you don’t have a training partner is to set up a camera and record your movements. You would be surprised how much better you perform under such objectivity.

– When I read something in silence,whose voice is it that’s speaking through me in my head?It certainly doesn’t sound like my voice.If that voice comes from ME, then I wouldn’t need to generate and then receive it because it’s already IN me and I would have already known it to be…but if it doesn’t come from me, where does it come from? Perhaps it’s a Universal Voice, one that is the same inside every brain.

– Sex and love are the most intellectual of all human endeavors. Nothing stimulates the mind better (maybe except for violence).

– The only way I can slow down my brain so it stops emitting racing, disorganized thoughts is with heavy squats. Weights destroy not just the muscles in the body, but intrusive thoughts in the mind. After a good squat workout, the volume gets turned way down.

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