I never click the “like” button. It’s a cheap and ambiguous way to give compliments to people that usually don’t deserve them anyway. The only likes I click are my own comments. Does that make me a faggot?

(…it’s passive. it’s for people who are too lazy to actually write something that matter. but they still want to feel connected and involved with their friends and community).

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Messy Room…

I don’t see the point of cleaning my bedroom most of the time. I’m only in it when I sleep…and when I’m asleep I won’t be conscious of the mess. Unless I’m dating someone, no one else comes into my room anyway. Even if my girlfriend sees my mess, it only further confirms my individuality. Einstein said that if a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, then an empty desk indicates mindlessness. The same idea can be applied to a bedroom. What you put in your room and how you arrange things are physical and external traces of your inner life (maybe you don’t want the other person to know what’s going on in your mind? But that’s another story). Whoever said that making your bed right after you wake up is like tying your shoes after you take them off might have a point.

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50/50 The movie…

So I went to see the movie 50/50 about a 27 year old guy, played by Joseph Levitt Gordon, who has cancer and has a 50 percent chance of dying. It was really good until the point when the doctor told his family that he was going to live. They should have killed him…or at least made an alternate ending where he dies. They could have randomly distributed the film 50/50, with half of the theaters in the world getting the version where he dies, and the other 50 getting the one that he lives. That way no amount of spoiler could ruin it

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It’s funny how that the foods we eat have so much variety and are so heterogeneous. Yet it’s a shame when it comes out of our assholes as feces it’s rendered and compressed to be so uniformed and homogenous and boring.

We eat together, shit alone – It’s only natural to want to eat together with others in public, but when we shit, we try to do it in private and conceal as much about the process and the materiality of it as possible. I guess it would be pretty strange to do the opposite. Take your tray and then eat alone in a restaurant that’s designed to only fit and serve one person. But it would have a huge restroom, so that 2 hours later, you can get together in it with all your buddies to defecate and urinate together in a big circle.

My favorite thing to do now with my date is to eat out of the same plate, and then go to the bathroom together. I always tell her to not flush, so I can pee and shit on top of her pee on shit and then flush it all down together. I feel complete this way. When you mix all that stuff together, you really feel close to that person because you are practically blending your insides together.

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If you have a defect that is obviously present to both yourself and an interlocutor – a crooked nose…worse, a severed limb or a hunched back, or that if you are a midget…how would you behave in front of other people? And how would you expect others to treat you?

Should you point out your defect immediately and get rid of the awkwardness/save the embarrassment by laying out, or even dissecting it in the open, right from the start? Or should you let your interlocutor decide whether or not to look at it and even talk about it? Not looking at it and pretending that this outstanding feature doesn’t exist would create a tension that might increase the more you avoid its presence. Looking at it would confirm the disfigurement and maybe even out the tension temporarily.

But another problem arises once the disfigurement is established on both sides. How should you treat this person now? Should you overstep yourself by showing direct sympathy to a midget and be really nice to him and help him carry his oversized luggage? Or should you show indifference and treat him like a regular person and leave the luggage for him to carry on his own and watch him struggle? Either way you might be disrespecting or mistreating him (or so he feels). He might be offended by both choices, and you might feel either too aggressive or not aggressive enough. No matter how you choose to treat him, your choice of action can become something that you are aware of, and that he is also painfully aware of. And then it would become something you sense and assume he is aware of, and at the same time he senses and becomes aware of your state of awareness about his awareness. At this point, an infinite regress feeds back on itself in a loop that can hardly be terminated…

Sometimes there’s even an air of moral superiority displayed by the handicapped because they are often times convinced that other people can’t see life through their perspectives…and they take advantage of their defects by turning suffering into a kind of righteousness or debts that others automatically owe him just because he is disfigured.

If I was disfigured, I would definitely take advantage of it and go around making people do things for you, and then make them feel bad or awkward about it on purpose.

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I can lose fat so fast that I can eat whatever I want, and then just cut down right before an important date/trip to the beach. Sometimes I see a girl on the street, I run to the nearest phone booth (more heat), do some plyos and pushups, and come back ripped as fuck to get her number. See, most people get their hair and nail done, buy new shoes or clothes to prepare for things like that. I get shredded.

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