Help guys, what’s dis mean?

This really, really obese kid from my high school who was racist as fuck and always made fun of me had became Michael Bay (while looking exactly like his old self back in high school). I went to his new action film screening where he shot, produced, edited, directed, written, and even drove all the stunt cars and was all the stuntmen simultaneously…

Even though I really liked the movie, I pretended to hate it anyway because everyone said it sucked just to conform, even though deep inside everyone knew that everyone else liked it a lot and just didn’t want to admit it.

After the screening the fat Michael Bay came out and with him was a stunning 10/10 black woman that looked exactly like Rihanna but was not Rihanna. He announced they had just met backstage and now engaged. I walked up to them and started talking to them about philosophy and kept repeating the phrase “due to our advanced technology, squat techniques from the deep web had significantly increased the ass-sphere of the planet by increasing the volume, intensity, and the color of the collective gluteus maxims” until she finally looked at me and said “get the fuck out of here” while waving her finger as fast as humanly possible.

After everyone left the after party I stayed behind and saw Bay’s wife sleeping while masturbating through her jeans while laying fully clothed on top of all the left over foods and drinks. When I walked closer to her to watch her more closely, her eyes started to squirt out water like laser gun. The closer I moved, the more water was squirting out but the more blinded she was and thus could not see me when I was literally in her face.

This was when I became 100 percent convinced that intention creates and distorts a observer-dependent reality.

ps. 1/2 dream, 1/2 made up while writing it up because I can’t remember.
Photo: Help guys, what’s dis mean?

This really, really obese kid from my high school who was racist as fuck and always made fun of me had became Michael Bay (while looking exactly like his old self back in high school). I went to his new action film screening where he shot, produced, edited, directed, written, and even drove all the stunt cars and was all the stuntmen simultaneously…

Even though I really liked the movie, I pretended to hate it anyway because everyone said it sucked just to conform, even though deep inside everyone knew that everyone else liked it a lot and just didn’t want to admit it.

After the screening the fat Michael Bay came out and with him was a stunning 10/10 black woman that looked exactly like Rihanna but was not Rihanna. He announced they had just met backstage and now engaged. I walked up to them and started talking to them about philosophy and kept repeating the phrase “due to our advanced technology, squat techniques from the deep web had significantly increased the ass-sphere of the planet by increasing the volume, intensity, and the color of the collective gluteus maxims” until she finally looked at me and said “get the fuck out of here” while waving her finger as fast as humanly possible.

After everyone left the after party I stayed behind and saw Bay’s wife sleeping while masturbating through her jeans while laying fully clothed on top of all the left over foods and drinks. When I walked closer to her to watch her more closely, her eyes started to squirt out water like laser gun. The closer I moved, the more water was squirting out but the more blinded she was and thus could not see me when I was literally in her face.

This was when I became 100 percent convinced that intention creates and distorts a observer-dependent reality.

ps. 1/2 dream, 1/2 made up while writing it up because I can’t remember.

 


 

I found a new way to motivate myself while doing cardio (Which is up to 5x a week); Watching “Keeping up with the Kardashians” .

The show was playing on the treadmill monitor this morning. Never before did I experience such multiplicity of emotions at once. I was envious, sexually aroused, jealous, happy, angry, sad, confused, contemplative, mindless…etc, all at once.

This drove me to run faster and longer than I had previously thought possible. It was like I was sprinting in place and my legs were cycling on top of a gigantic,11 dimensional ’sphere’ constructed from various substances such as flowers, clitoris, MDMA, brains, tiger skin, violin strings, BBCs, tears, tampons, clouds, various insects, and etc, which extends to reach th sky at the speed of light.

The more I run, the more I seem to be ’smoothening out’ the uneven surface of this sphere, making it smaller, more comprehensible and controllable both materially and conceptually. And when it finally shrunk, alongside my fat, down to the size of an atom and was imperceptible to my senses, I knew I’ve had a successful cardio session.

kim


I often feel like the world is divided into two halves – people who watch my video and people who don’t. The former is inside me, and the latter is outside.


Is the first thing you do in the morning, even before you brush your teeth, to go on the internet to check your FB/email?

I know it’s fun, like opening up a Christmas present every morning. If time allows it, I recommend you to hold that off for just a sec. Do something else you would normally do during the day anyway before you get sucked into the virtual world (or do something new entirely). It could be meditating for 20 minutes and, read/do cardio for half a hour. This makes going online so much more rewarding and a great way to start the day.


 

I have a fever. It’s the first time in 5 years that I’ve gotten sick.
When you are healthy, you take that state for granted. You really don’t know how good it feels to not be sick until you are sick. When you are sick, being healthy is the most euphoric state of being you can imagine. Advil, a seemingly insignificant pain and fever reducer that temporarily brings you back to normal state of health is suddenly more powerful than Molly or coke. Dat relative feels.


The reason why people should lift and build a nice physique is not that an aesthetic physique and muscles are end of all ends, but it is the perfect cherry to put on top of anything you do in life… In a way, having a nice physique is kind of like being high on cannabis – it makes everything you do in life just a little bit (or a lot) better, especially the small and mundane things like smoking a cigar, playing music, mowing the lawn, rolling a joint, walking your dog mindlessly, sitting on your desk at work, even sleeping and dreaming and talking on the phone with somebody you’ve never met.

 

 

 

Advertisements